Archive | August, 2012

Sour Note…

16 Aug

Why does it always seem to be that, when you’re having a good day, something or somebody ALWAYS comes along & ruins it? Ok, maybe not necessarily ruin it, but put a damper on it… Today was going soooo well, no drama, my dad called in sick to work, but no drama linked with it at all, babysit at my sisters, helped her give the boys baths, both boys were good.


Then I get a text, or a couple I should say, from 1 of my bestest friends in the world. There went my day. Now, not only is my day ruined, but now I feel horrible. She texted me asking why I am now suddenly busy with my sister on ‘our’ day. ‘Our’ day is usually Tuesdays because her daughter who has cerebral palsy, has therapy that day & her dad usually takes her to her therapy & spends time with her after school, & is my BFF’s day off to do whatever. More times that not, her husband would call her with some problem with the baby, whether it be what was he going to feed her, there was no food in the house, did he really have to make her food, or some other problem with her. Mind you, my BFF has already made plans for her that day, & has food for her in the house, all he’d have to do is make it. Or, make something for himself, make a little bit extra & feed it to her. The baby is in no way a picky eater, she will eat whatever you feed her. But, 9 out of 10 Tuesday’s, he’s calling my BFF & giving her the guilt trip because he wants to get out of doing any kind of work at home, full on knowing that my friend will buckle & end up either coming home early, or will bring something home for her to eat.


And, now she’s giving me a hard time about helping my sister out? My sister, who JUST had not ONE child, but TWO 6 weeks ago!! Mind you, when my BFF had just had her baby, who is now 4, either myself or her sister or her mom, if not all 3 of us at the same time, were over there helping her out with her one child. My sister’s fiancee has a full time job so they can have money for food to eat, to have a place to live etc. Yes, my sister can do a lot on her own, but the fact is, is that she has twice as much work as my friend did, AND she is ALL ALONE from 6 am to 430 pm Monday through Friday!! They don’t have the luxury of having the man stay home with her as well to help her out, like with my BFF. Now I feel horrible because she is making it sound like I am ditching her for no good reason. She’s saying I can take a day off from babysitting & come over & see her. But another thing she doesn’t realize is that if I take a day off from babysitting, I now have no car to get to her house… My youngest sister has her car that she would be using to drop my mom off to work at 6am, then going over to our other sister’s house, then going back to pick my mom up from work, leaving me at home with no transportation…And even if she dropped me off at my BFF’s house, we’d have no way of leaving to go anywhere. Not to mention that I still have no job AND no money. AND, my car has no insurance on it either, as well as no gas, so even if it WERE working, I still couldn’t use it. Which is now leaving me in the same boat. I still wouldn’t be able to go over & see her anyway. So, rather than sit at home all day doing nothing but being a couch potato, I’m making the best use of my time…


The sad thing is, is that I’ve already told her all this. She’s known since pretty much the beginning when we found out my sister was pregnant that I’d be going over to help her out, & ‘our’ days would be put on hold indefinitely. And she knows about my car troubles, & me having no job or money. So, what can I do? I don’t want to be mean to her & rub it in her face in a sense, but seriously, what else can I do? They have only 1 car & on those days, her husband is using it to go to therapy with their daughter. So, its not like she can come pick me up or anything. And then now, my sister is going to be starting school & guess what days she’s going? Tuesdays & Thursdays. Which REALLY leaves only me to babysit. There is NO way I am leaving my youngest sister to babysit twins all on her own with next to no experience in the field… Oh, & another thing my friend brought up was that there was 3 of us to babysit. Not sure who she was thinking of as the 3rd person. But she also said that she was sure 1 other friend of ours would babysit for my sister. 1-that friend is OUR friend, AND to leave her alone with MY twin nephews with no pay? Not to mention that my sister doesn’t really know her, or at least enough that she’d want to leave her twin children home with her alone. 2-Leave that friend of ours with my twin nephews while me & said other friend go out to hang out? How wrong is that? Not to mention, that if any 1 of the rest of us was in that position, we’d probably say screw you & not do it. I mean, it’s 1 thing if I was going to be there with her & she would be my help. But to basically ask her to babysit my twin nephews for me so I can go hang out with our other best friend? My BFF used to get pissed at a friend of her’s when the friend would ask her to babysit her 2 children for 5 minutes then disappear for 5 hours. Imagine how she’d feel if put in that position. Oh yeah, please babysit them while me & our other best friend go hang out together…Yeah, THAT’D go over real well!


I’m thinking that for both of our safety, I’ll just…slightly overlook it for now. Not ignore it, just…I don’t know. Don’t take it personally, & not be rude about it. I’ll just have to gently remind her that the babies are only 6 weeks old & there is 2 of them to only 1 parent during the day, AND that she also got the same treatment from me way back when, when she had her daughter. And most importantly, that it’s nothing to do with her or our friendship. It’s bad enough that we pretty much got into a fight the other day over nothing. *rolls eyes* We both were having a bad day, & she was majorly snapping at me. Took everything I had to not bite her head off because I was on my period…


Anyway, wish me luck, send me tips on how I can tackle this best. 


The Sky is Falling

11 Aug

Oh my goodness! I haven’t been on here in so long! Tons of things have happened in my life, & it seems like nothing good.

First off, I was fired from my job. Yes, fired, & for something that everyone was supposed to be doing but was not. I admit, yes I did not do that, BUT noone else was either. That was in late March, & I still have not found a job. The new manager there is a asshole, noone likes him, & for some reason, he took whatever his problem was that day out on me. Everyone keeps telling me to fight it, but I honestly don’t have it in me to fight it. It was wrong, it sucked & still sucks, & they did not follow their own rules, but I honestly feel that if I try to fight this, I’ll end up loosing. I feel like I’d be going up against 10 foot giant, how could I possibly win?? Now, I am completely out of money, still have a few bills to pay & nothing to pay them with. Did I also mention that I was turned down for unemployment as well? Yep, can’t even get unemployment. Their official reason was because I was fired for not doing my job. I wouldn’t be surprised if my old job is still messing with me & that is why I still don’t have a job & was turned down for unemployment. I am almost thinking of going back to Chase just so I can be making money, no matter how little I would be making. On top of that, my car broke down (don’t worry, I was at home when it happened, so its not like I got stuck somewhere). Turns out 1 of the head gaskets is blown. Of course, its the hardest 1 to get to…& it’s in the middle of summer now (it wasn’t when it happened, but at the time, my dad had other cars to work on that were a tad bit higher on the list to be fixed). So now, its in the triple digits, over the weekend of course-the only time my dad has to work on it…And since I don’t have a job, I can’t take it to a mechanic to fix it because I have no money to pay him with. So here I am stuck-no job, no money, no hopes of getting a new job, broken car…

Plus, this has just been a bad week! Some bad stuff went down in the family. I am sorry, I am not at liberty to say what. It does not directly deal with me, but it still majorly sucks for the people involved! And it could have been just a small easy fix!! Plus, I happen to be on my period, which is a bad 1 this month. Then, my bff pretty much has a breakdown on me & it was almost a fight between us, & because everything seems to be going wrong in my life I thought it could have been the end of our friendship. Thank god it wasn’t but still…right in the midst of the family drama, having my period, having a fight with my BFF, on top of getting fired, getting turned down for unemployment, still not having a job, having no money, my car breaking down…

Life sucks for me right now. I don’t know what to do. Right now, I am so worried about everything that I am making myself sick. I’ve had the runs for the past few days & I just am not feeling well. Of course, because of all the above listed problems in my life, I can’t go see a doctor because I have no insurance what so ever.

Then, on top of that, today my dad was getting all nit picky on me. He decides to go on facebook today, & starts in on me that I am posting too much. Not TMI, but just posting too many things I guess, as opposed to him NEVER posting. He posts nothing, never gets back to anyone who writes him, nothing, because he feels he has ‘nothing to say’. So why is he on facebook??  I don’t get it. If you look at my facebook page, its mostly jokes & funny things that I have been reposting. And it honestly is not even that much!!!! I swear to god-he gets on facebook maybe twice a month if you’re lucky! So, yes, if you are almost never on, then I guess it all adds up, but in reality it is not that much! And then, he’s asking me what this post means, what my cousin means by this, what does this mean. Mind you I am sitting across the freaking room from him, & I am not & can not read his computer screen, so how the hell am I supposed to know?

This is all I need! On top of everything else going on in my life, I need him to get nit picky on me! Trust me, right now is NOT the time you want to do that unless you want a fight that will only end in me crying my eyes out & locking myself in my room for the night. So, to avoid a fight, I just went straight to the end & am now in my room with the door closed. I am planning on spending the afternoon in here for obvious reasons.

So I guess that about sums it up. Wish me luck on finding a new job…I’m going to need all the help I can get! Also, if you know of anyplace thats hiring in my area, please feel free to let me know 🙂 Thank you so much.